Entertainment
Your Totally-Not-Made-Up Weekend Horoscopes
Don’t make any weekend plans without consulting these highly authentic, never-fabricated, 100% fact-based weekend horoscopes. I’ve got the spiritual scoop on the next 72 hours, and the stars are telling me you should be on the lookout for sarcasm.
By Missy Baker · August 9, 2024
Your Odd News Weekend Horoscope
Want to know what the stars have in store for you this weekend? Look no further than these very real, totally accurate, definitely not fake Horoscopes. I've called upon my trusted sources in the great beyond to find out exactly what the future holds for all 12 Zodiac signs, even the duds.Will an old flame heat up your summer weekend? Will your boss ever respect you? Is everything I'm saying totally made up? Read on to find out!
No matter what star sign you were born under, one thing's for sure. You should absolutely, 100% without a doubt, base your entire life on everything you read here. Odd News Show
Aries
You're safe now. Odd News Show
Gemini
The REAL walk of shame. Odd News Show
Taurus
When will you learn, Taurus? Odd News Show
Cancer
Being indoors prevents sun damage! Odd News Show
Leo
Peasants. Odd News Show
Virgo
Don't worry they think everything's cringe. Odd News Show
Libra
Sorry, family. Odd News Show
Scorpio
Stay strong. Odd News Show
Sagittarius
That stinks. Odd News Show
Capricorn
Time is an illusion. Odd News Show
Aquarius
Do you smell that? Odd News Show