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Your Totally-Not-Made-Up Weekend Horoscopes (June 7- 9)
Don’t make any weekend plans without consulting these highly authentic, never-fabricated, 100% fact-based weekend horoscopes.
I’ve got the spiritual scoop on the next 72 hours, and the stars are telling me you should be on the lookout for sarcasm in the extremely near future.
By Missy Baker · June 7, 2024
Your Odd News Weekend Horoscope
Want to know what the stars have in store for you? Look no further than these very real, totally accurate, definitely not fake Horoscopes. I've called upon my trusted sources in the great beyond to find out exactly what the future holds for all 12 Zodiac signs, even the duds.Will you spend the weekend casually cannonballing into a neighbor's pool or will extended time with your friends and family finally drive you to the brink of insanity? Is everything I'm saying completely made up? Read on to find out!
No matter what star sign you were born under, one thing's for sure. You should absolutely, 100% without a doubt, base your entire life on everything you read here. Odd News Show
Aries
You WILL hate yourself on Monday. Odd News Show
Gemini
Remember, it's all in the hips. Odd News Show
Taurus
You ARE the chosen one. Odd News Show
Cancer
They won't believe you, but you can try. Odd News Show
Leo
Looks like you'll be wearing turtlenecks for the rest of the summer. Odd News Show
Virgo
Let it out, Virgo. Odd News Show
Libra
Remeber actually wanting to leave the house? Odd News Show
Scorpio
They must've shrunk. Odd News Show
Sagittarius
Why, Sag, why? Odd News Show
Capricorn
Destiny should've texted. Odd News Show
Aquarius
Another mystery of the universe. Odd News Show