Entertainment
Your Totally-Not-Made-Up Weekend Horoscopes (May 10‑12)
Don’t make any weekend plans without consulting these highly authentic, never-fabricated, 100% fact-based weekend horoscopes. I’ve got the spiritual scoop on the next 72 hours, and the stars are telling me you should be on the lookout for sarcasm in the extremely near future.
By Missy Baker · May 11, 2024
Your Odd News Weekend Horoscope
Want to know what the stars have in store for you? Look no further than these very real, totally accurate, definitely not fake Horoscopes. I've called upon my trusted sources in the great beyond to find out exactly what the future holds for all 12 Zodiac signs, even the duds.Will a mysterious stranger tickle your fancy on Saturday? Will you ever get a table at brunch on Sunday? Is everything I'm saying completely made up? Read on to find out! No matter what star sign you were born under, one thing's certain. You should absolutely, 100% without a doubt, base your entire life on everything you read here. Odd News Show
Aries
Grow up, Aries. Odd News Show
Gemini
Couch potato > Barfly (at least for this weekend). Odd News Show
Taurus
What happened to “it’s the thought that counts?" Odd News Show
Cancer
You’ve been asked to leave, Cancer. Odd News Show
Leo
Leos gonna Leo. Odd News Show
Virgo
Keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times. Odd News Show
Libra
Productivity is overrated. Odd News Show
Scorpio
You don’t. Believe me, you don’t. Odd News Show
Sagittarius
Stop hiding behind the frozen foods. They can’t protect you. Odd News Show
Capricorn
Delulu is the solulu. Odd News Show
Aquarius
There is such a thing as TOO MUCH family time. Odd News Show